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While the traditional roles of a man or woman in a marriage are changing and both the man and the woman may be professionally successful, decisions about the suitability of the couple for arranged marriages is primarily driven by the ability of the man to provide for the family.
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When marriage involves a significantly older man, the ability to earn a livelihood or provide for the family has a significant role to play when evaluating the age difference in marriage.
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Most importantly, the pregnancy came as a shock to her and she did not know who the father was. She dated significantly older men, had a child and is raising the child on her own.
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Take the case of Padma Lakshmi, a famous model and TV personality. In arranged marriages with significantly older grooms (over 15 years age difference), the burden of raising the offspring after marriage may be borne by the bride or other family members. This factor plays a role not only in arranged marriages but also in romantic relationships. If the age difference is such that one of the parents will be too old to play an active role in bringing up a child, it may have a bearing on the decision to get married or have a child. While the ability to have a child is a factor, having the strength and stamina to help bring up a child is also a key factor that influences decisions on the suitability of the age difference in marriage.
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In patriarchal societies such as those in South Asia or the Middle East, the ability to bear children is seen exclusively from the point of view fo the age of the woman.Įven in love marriages, men and women start seeking a relationship or marriage when they realize that they may not be able to bear children with advancing age. So in addition to the age difference, the absolute age of the bride and the groom also plays a role. The chance of having a child is much higher for women younger than 35 years and men younger than 40 years. In arranged marriages, younger women are seen as more ‘fertile’ and hence the preference for younger girls when matches are shortlisted. Ability to bear childrenĪbility to bear children plays a key part in helping people decide the acceptable age difference in marriage. These perceptions are based on the following factors. Hence, marrying an older guy evens out the real age of the couple! How do we find out the ideal age difference in marriage?Įvery individual or couple or family believes the couple have a different understanding of what age difference is acceptable. There is also the popular misconception that childbirth somehow ages girls. A younger girl ensures the status quo of a patriarchal society is retained. Marriage was not meant to be an equal partnership either. In bygone days, the boy was the breadwinner while the girl was the hearth keeper, so it made sense for a young girl to seek an older, well-settled boy. Your parents are pushing you to marry a girl who is much younger than you.īut why do we worry about the age difference in marriage? Your parents are pushing you to marry a man who is a lot older than you.ģ. You are interested in someone who is above or below the perceived perfect age difference for marriage.Ģ. The question probably arose because of one of three possibilities:ġ. Factors such as social status, age, religion or caste take a back seat. In most cases, love blossoms because of personal chemistry, compatible lifestyles or worldviews, shared dreams or goals. When marrying for love, age is definitely not a factor. If you are going through an arranged marriage, your ideal match is picked for you! Parents and siblings will make sure that the boy is at least of the same age or older by 2 years to 10 years.Īrranged marriages between an older bride and a younger groom are rare and usually never considered as a viable option. The answer depends on who you are – male or a female, and how you plan on getting married – marrying for love or arranged marriage. What is considered an acceptable age difference in marriage?